Nickolas 12 DePalma

Nickolas 12 DePalma, aka Nick DePalma, 12, Brown Thunder, Enemy of the State, Bill Hopkins, Die Zwölf Teufel, and [classified], was the co-director/writer/creator/producer of the largely successful movie The Scarying. He has helped create many movies and short films, as well as a multitude of other things such as video games and television shows.

Despite his happy-go-lucky demeanor, Nick has a dark past. Unlike most children, Nick was not born, instead, he just was and is. This is a hard concept for most people, including Nick to understand. He has no idea where he came from and spends his nights contemplating this enigma. Most experts believe however, that he was never given The Talk. Nick also suffers from RBBD (Reverse Benjamin Button Disease). This means that as the years go on, Nick will start to grow older and age. As of right now, there is no cure.

Other than his creative exploits, Nick is also well known for his rather impressive criminal record. In the span of about a month (Jan. 13-Feb. 17 2008), he was able to accumulate the following charges:

Possesion of illagal fireworks; Conspiracy to commit arson; Arson; Breaking and entering; Armed robbery; Possesion of a weapon without a permit; Grand theft auto; 21 traffic violations; Reckless driving; Vehicular homicide; Evading arrest; Obstructing a police officer; Stealing a squad car; Forgery of a passport; Hijacking a plane; Tampering with smoke detectors; Flying in a military No-Fly Zone; Refusing to lower altitude; Possesion of military-grade RPG; Destruction of U.S. Airforce Property; Illegal landing in a foreign country; Trafficking stolen goods; Dealing with enemies of the state; Conspiracy to steal high-grade explosives; Possesion of high-grade explosives; Conspiracy to commit treason; Conspiracy to commit piracy; Hijacking a Royal Carribean Cruise ship; Sailing in government waters; Destruction of U.S. Coast Guard/Navy Property; Unauthorized docking in Maryland; Conspiracy to use high-grade explosives; Use of high-grade explosives in close proximity to a U.S government building; Treason; Resisting arrest; Escape from federal prison.

November 12, 2007
This date is extremely important because it is the day that changed Nick's life forever. That entire day makes the hardest Rock Star's binge look like Sunday School at Methodist United. All hard data (ie photographs, video, witnesses, etc.) have been destroyed, but authorities were able to piece together the days events by looking through Nick's Twitter page. It should be known that Nick is a Twiiter-holic, and cannot stop tweeting his actions. Below is a complete transcript:

AM

5:00- ugh, im soooo tired... why did i stay up so late? I'm never hanging out with Tupac again.

5:15- Dang, 10 gallons of Cristal really runs through you, imma go take a whizz

5:17- whoops, that wasnt the toilet, sorry, Tom.

5:25- Tom's such a moron, he thought he could beat me in a knife fight. Who's laughing now, Tom?! Not you, you're dead.

5:30- Knife fights make me hungry... time for an elephant sandwhich.

5:50- That hit the spot. Note to self: get new elephant and buy more shotgun rounds.

6:00- Im still hungry, im going to take a drive over to Costco and pick up an elephant.

6:10- damn car wont start, better go borrow my neighbor's car.

6:15- Frank really needs to change his garage password, this is almost too easy

6:17- In the name of sportsmanship, im going to break into his bedroom first and then make my way to the garage. This will be totes fun.

6:20- I made it into the bedroom!

6:21- I REALLY SHOULD HAVE SET MY PHONE ON SILENT! STUPID TWITTER CHIRP!!!!

6:30- Frank's such a moron, he thought he could beat me in a knife fight. Who's laughing now, Frank?! Not you, you're dead.

6:31- I really have to stop stabbing people.......... jk lolz i'll stab whoever i want!

6:35- dang, Frank! when did u get the Corvette? How did my surveilance cameras miss that? Whatevs, time go score some sweet, sweet elephant.

6:45: this Tweet serves no purpose but to show that it is possible to drive 120 mph and text at the same time. Take that safweornbw025048y25894-vnxm4xm2g2xgmxgxg/

6:50- owwwwwwwwwwwww... I dont remember that left turn being there that early, dang it...well, i guess it's a good thing Frank is dead, he wont miss his Corvette.